hydrogen carbon and rust

soup hydrogen soup carbon 

truths scratched from the dirt 

rusting trucks 

die with years
in dry grass below

and with vultures above 

in waiting 

hungry like the old

hungry like the forgotten
waiting in line

for the dead

to come

waiting 

like we wait 

to die

the last night of me-

put yourself out there
you will learn better
one of these days when
you've been chewed up and spit out
so many times
you're not even solid aymore
and love
ha
loving the wrong people is all you seem to do
until you those wrong people
have brought out everything
that ever made you break
as a child
but you're an adult now
and when you break
you shatter
into dust

when all the people you loved so much
find their way
they will have already killed you
you will be gone
and dead
and it won't matter to you
you were the sacrafice
you were the lesson
you were not made for this world
so
close your eyes
it's time to let your body
and everything else
go

march 3rd- i can't write for shit

spent saturday night
in a hotel
with you
-
crazy as that sounds
it used to inspire
something
adventures
and moments
that made me love
and made me feel good

but now
it doesn't excite
or inspire
it doesn't make me
feel like i can move mountains
or conquer the world
with my love
cause i don't feel the love
anymore
like once before
you kept us down

there's no movement
there's no growth
there's no life
cause this isn't loving
and this isn't living
cause you and i aren't in love anymore
i love you
and i care about you
enough to let you go

i don't want to see you ruined
i'd rather feel you
in love so crazy so wild
i'd rather go mad from love
than insane from
existing and watching our love as it goes away
fades away
that is the worst thing
i could ever imagine
the one thing i would never want
to go through
set it on fire
watch it burn
while it's still up in flames
we turn
and run away

never watch it die
never fade away

blah