Monday, April 01, 2013

to my last love

to my last love

you were never really there to begin with
you didn't make me feel very loved
in the end - it wasn't up to me to try and make us work. i did that for years and you still didn't care to make it right.
i have my faults but when it comes to you and i -
and why i don't love you anymore
it's because of you. 100%.
you kept me out of your life. you kept me hidden. you never validated our relationship or me even though you knew that hurt me. even though you promised me you would - i trusted your word and your heart over and over again... but that was me being a fool.
all the other "issues" didn't matter if you couldn't even be open about our "relationship" to the other people in your life. cause then there is no relationship. and if there's no real relationship then your issues with me could be treated the same way you treated me and what i wanted--- not important enough to change. you ignored my needs and feelings for so long that  i don't love you anymore.

today i cried a bit when i thought of how much i loved you and how amazing it once felt
that was so long ago
you were careless and took my love for granted
 and now it's gone
i don't have it anymore
for you
i don't want it anymore either
i wasted a lot of myself
running around circles with you.

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